I met my girlfriend a year before I started going out with her. It took so long for the relationship to start because she would open up and then quickly pull away, never sure if she was ready to move on from her ex (who treated her horribly). She'd do things like tell me she was ready to date me shortly before sleeping with him again. I stopped talking to her altogether after about 7 months of receiving mixed signals. Two months later, she ran back to me with open arms and apologetically told me that she wanted to start a relationship.
I gave her a chance, and the relationship was amazing.
Three months into our relationship, I went to college 350 miles from her. We flew to see each other a few times. Meanwhile, she was telling me things like "I want to marry you after under grade school" and "I want to spend the rest of my life with you". About a month into it, however, she said she needed a break, that she needs time to take care of herself before she can give into the relationship (her life is pretty darn stressful...although I always thought I was more of a support system than a burden). She's suddenly a completely different person, always starting fights and blaming me for our issues, when really her ambivalence is the root of the problem.
We're talking about getting back together again. I know I shouldn't go back to her because of how horribly she can treat me, but she just made me so dang happy when we were actually together that I'm inclined to give it another shot. I'm not even sure I can control myself; I'm most likely going to open up to her given the chance.
What should I do? And assuming that I do go back to her, should I lay out some ground rules? What kind of ground rules can I lay out without pushing her away?
a masochistic hopeless romantic